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Happiness: As Good As It Gets

By: Rick London
 

Recently a friend sent me an email asking me my secret to happiness. It took me by surprise as I didn't have an answer. I can remember a time in my life when my moods would swing, I had depression, but I was treated and do not live with that now. But happy? I wouldn't exactly call it that.

As a kid, the medical community considered me dysthymic and without much motivation. Actually, that was a symptom of my boredom, and didn't have a lot to do with my brain chemistry. I had a relatively high IQ in (Mississippi) in their public schools, and very little could attract my attention; except when girls started wearing shorter skirts.

As in Kafka's memorable opening line in Anna Karinina "All happy families are alike. Each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way". We had our own way of being unhappy. And if someone tried to change that status quo it was considered "making waves". Victim mentality was a good thing. People felt sympathy. It was also a very unhealthy thing, fueled with a good bit of dysfunction. But I feel grateful to have experienced it and moved on, learned from it, and possibly won't repeat it.

Happiness, to me, if there is such a thing, is really getting down to basics. By basics I mean go as far back as The U.S. Constitution "...and the pursuit of happiness" which is actually written by these stern men with no smiles, at least not in their renderings, but they knew the importance of it.

Shakespeare, like many writers, instinctively knew how important it was to be true to oneself. He coined the phrase "To thine own self be true". He didn't say that just to show off. He was providing years of therapy into one sentence. If one is true to oneself, the amount of money, fame, or any other trappings don't mean a thing.

With this in mind, let's count how many ways we compromise our happiness, or make certain it does not happen. We take jobs which are terrible but pay well. We do not like our co-workers and they do not like us. We do not like our boss and he does not like us either. We get married and have kids out of peer pressure. All our friends and associates did it, but we were not ready, or the opposite. We decided not to get married as we grew up in an unhappy home, and we would "show our parents with sweet revenge" (That was my modus operandi for many years). Suddenly it occurred to me they didn't care what I did as long as I was in the pursuit of happiness. Besides, they were deceased. Or we spend too much on credit to impress someone or a lot of people and then feel the pressure as the bills come.

We learn some mighty lessons from these "failures of adulthood" and I do not say that judgementally. I am no different than anyone else in this arena. I have changed careers many times (put on new masks) until I found the one that fit me. It worked and I am much happier. I didn't say happy. I dont know if I am or not. But I am usually optomistic.

I don't know that I am a happy person, but I am a lot happier than I was ten years ago, and I hope a decade from now I'm a lot happier than I am now. To repeat a great movie phrase from Robert DeNiro to Billy Crystal in "Analyze That" "It's a process, doc".

When I simplify my life and make myself healthier, I make myself available to more emotionally available people. That part is my responsibility. I cannot ask the universe to do it for me. It won't. I have to do the legwork. It is fine to pray if you are a believer (and I am), but whether you are or not )a believer), the legwork still has to be done.

As far as work, life is too short to do work you hate. We do not live in our parent's generation. The opportunities are endless in the workplace. Yes, at times to find the job we really want, we may have to start at lower pay, but doing what we love attracts the kind of income that suits us.

Working in the field of humor, comedy, or cartooning is not the answer necessarily. It may be if that is what you desire. Whatever field you choose, expose yourself to it. It has been proven that it becomes a part of us. Before you know it, if you've watched enough comedy films, seen enough funny Internet or newspaper cartoons, read enough jokes, etc., you find your mind thinking in funnier ways. It really has that effect.

Dr. Bernie Siegel who wrote a best-seller in the 1980's, Love, Laughter, And Healing helped me a great deal when my mother was dying of cancer. I called him. He claims in his book that he had incurable brain cancer and exposed himself to many comedy movies, videos, cartoons, and sitcoms. He had no idea if it would help heal him, he just felt his mortality and wanted to laugh a bit. Within a few years, his brain cancer was in remission and he still is alive and writing two decades later. I have discussed this with him on several occasions and he offered up some of the greatest advice I ever had, expose your mom to humor. I went to the video store daily and found a different comedy film every day and we watched it together. It also brought me closer to my mom. She lived about four years longer than they expected.

Dr. Seigel's advice became paramount in my life and still is. It had a monumental effect on me. The only other such event was a Gary Larson Far Side exhibit at the Smithsonian in the mid-1980's. I saw just how important humor and cartooning really is in our culture. I never knew it at the time, that I would enter the world of cartooning, but my fans and friends insist it has a calming and healing effect. That adds to my happiness.

Giving the gift of laughter is kind of like Passing It Forward. It is contagious and people like being around you. Give it a try. It can be a gift, a joke, a story, or all of the above.

Article Source: Main Articles

The Internet's most visited cartoon is Londons Times www.londonstimes.us by Rick London. He also has numerous cartoon funny gift shops which he feels help spread happiness One cartoon gift item store is Top Cartoonist Rick London Shares Ways To Become Happier

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